Tuesday, November 29th, 2011
The Great Plains. No more fitting title could be bestowed upon this span of the great North American continent. They are indeed vast and rolling. Roads may roll off into the horizon for miles, unimpeded by any malignant geography. They are indeed very plain. How plain? Let's find out.
Today I spent my time driving through the remainder of Alberta, the entirety of Saskatchewan, and a tiny sliver of Manitoba. The other North American “bread basket.” The majority of trucks I've seen today were grain haulers. Wheat primarily, since it is too dry up here for corn I guess. There were some exceptions.
One town in Alberta apparently grows lots of beans. Pinto beans to be precise. I would look up the name of the town if I had internet tonight, but I am without again. This town is home to “Pinto,” the bean. Along the Trans-Canada Highway (hereafter referred to as the TCH), one will happen upon a statue. The figure itself is about 16' high, sports a cowboy hat, gun as well as your typical cowboy boots. There are some arms like you would see in a “Mr. Potatohead” playset. I believe he had a lasso in his other hand. “He” being a slightly anthropomorphic pinto bean. I will say that they got the bean collor dead nuts right, little flecks of darker brown on a soft pink background, as per the real life bean. The googly eyes may have been a bit much.
This whole display got me to thinking about what civilizations after us will think. I know that this is assuming that we will fall and crumble, since history sets an amazingly consistent precedent. I hope we can find a way out of our decay and fast! Back to my original thought, what would some archeologist think if they unearthed a giant (unknown material, but I'll posit some petro-chemical) pinto bean statue with googly eyes, a lasso and a gun? Would they take it as a holy symbol? (These people worshiped a genetically modified bean prone to violence and cattle rustling?) Would it be considered fine, ancient art like the cave paintings in Europe? (the goofy smile tells me probably not) Would they even understand it, or try to piece some story together from the broken remains of a small town? (most likely, and they'd assume that this part of the world was a bit off kilter).
Small rural towns certainly get a bit lonely it seems. It seems to me as if they all want to be special, but not so different that the other towns talk about them. One town's claim to fame along my route today was that had “The First Pivot Irrigation in Canada.” Seriously. So someone puts a massive pump in the middle of a field. Then comes the bright idea to put the irrigation on wheels and move it in a circle. (My first sighting of circular fields was a bit confusing). Well, this is enough to post two signs (one in each direction) and have some kind of little museum for it in town. Simple folk.
In spite of all this “Plain”-ness, I've enjoyed my time on this leg of the trip. The first three hours flew by. I was shocked to see that I'd already covered 180 miles by the time i though to look. I fueled up in Moosejaw, SK. and met some nice people. Had a bit of an incident there. Well, a couple, but one of note. I was pumping my fuel and washing my windows at the same time. Trucks stops as a rule have auto shut offs on their pumps when it gets close to full. It seems that this one did not. I was almost though washing my windows, when the guy next to me pointed, “HEY! Your fuel's spilling all over.” The pump was still going, spewing diesel fuel out of my tank like a geyser. A small geyser, but very alarming all the same. I released the handle, but only after about 20 liters (why is it spelled “litres” everywhere else?)of fuel had spilled all over the concrete pad. I ran into the store and told them that I spilled some diesel. A lot of diesel. (I wonder how much water a gallon of diesel can contaminate?) The maintenance guy reacted very calmly, “Well, that's why they pay me the big bucks. At least you came in to tell me. Most guys will just driver off eh?” I return to my truck to finish pumping, crisis now under control. Dude was one the scene with some oil-sorb (looks like cat litter but made to soak up oil and diesel) and was staunching the flow. Thankfully, environmental regulations mandate that all fuel islands have either raised borders (in this case) or be surrounded by a grate to eliminate runoff (like at the terminals). No water was harmed in this incident.
My pride was a bit hurt, but I didn't feel bad about it. I felt more a sense of surprise that it did overflow. This gave me reason to recall the sign that said “stay at your pump while dispensing fuel.” Despite that warning, the maintenance guy told that this stuff happens almost everyday. I joked about it being all those damn Americans coming up North and screwing everything up. He kinda laughed and I apologized again for the inconvenience. I drove the rest of the day without further mishaps enjoying the ride the whole way.
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